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by Mary C Findley

Anyone who has ever had children, worked with children, been around children or seen children is very familiar with the expression “he won’t share with me.” Hence the equally familiar response: “Share does not mean, ‘Give it to me now.’”

That same sentiment is also applied to love. We are absolutely drowning in advertisements telling us to buy something for someone to show or prove that we love them. That something might be jewelry (for her), a vehicle (for him) or a toy (for anyone). It might be something as large as a house or as small and insignificant as a box of candy.

Debt does not matter. Just give it to me. Why wait for marriage? Just give it to me. Need or purpose does not matter. I want it and if you love me, then just give it to me.
But this has nothing to do with love. Love is patient and kind. But more importantly, the very definition of love is to give someone what is best for them. And that requires knowing something about a person. Like giving a garment that does not fit is a gift a person cannot use.

Love understands a person well enough to know what is best for them. And usually that will require some waiting. But with some people, love might include encouraging or perhaps even prodding. We often do not know what we are capable of until we push ourselves. And that push, though often unwanted, is frequently an act of love

Love never fails. But when we are thinking of ourselves first, we are not loving. Love means giving what is best for the other person. Even when they do not want it.

Just as a humorous aside, here is a link to a Huffington Post article to help you shop for the billionaire on your gift list:

http://www.huffingtonpost.co.uk/2013/12/03/christmas-rich-gift-guide_n_4376622.html