What does the Bible say about love?

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by Joana Melisia James

Is love an emotion, a feeling, something you can fall in and out of at will? Does it happen by chance, or do you choose to make it happen?


The best definition I have ever heard of love came from my Pastor several years ago and it struck a chord with me. It goes like this: Love is a decision to prosper another person above yourself.


Now, that doesn’t mean that if you love someone they suddenly become more important than you. However it does mean that when you love someone you begin to consider their needs and wants above your own.

1 Corinthians 13:4-5 tells us that love is patient and kind, not jealous or boastful, not proud or rude, not irritable and does not hold grudges. I don’t know about you but that sounds like a decision to me.


I’ve always marveled at people who say “we fell in love.” It’s no wonder that they then “fall out of love” because love is not something that happens by chance. You have to decide to be patient with someone, you have to decide to be kind, you have to decide to not be proud or rude, you have to decide to not hold a grudge or be irritable. So if that’s what the bible says love is, then we’ve definitely gotten it wrong.


As for falling out of love, 1 Corinthians 13: 7 says that love never gives up, never loses faith, is always hopeful and endures EVERY circumstance. So how then do you fall out of love? Or is it really a decision to STOP being kind, and patient, and not proud, or not rude, or not hold grudges? See the difference?


Love the biblical way tells us that we decide to prosper another person. Love the way the world sees it tells us that love is an emotion. It tells us that Love is something you feel the first time you see someone, or something you fall into, or worse yet, a stirring in your pants. However, love is none of those things.


When you decide to love someone, you need to decide to love them forever. When they wrong you, you need to decide to forgive them. When they do things that seem unattractive to you, your love should propel you to want to help them back to the right path. Love doesn’t run away when things get hard. Love doesn’t lose hope or faith. Love endures through every circumstance.


So we see then why Christ asked us to love our neighbors as we love ourselves, because nobody who loves themselves will ever give up on themselves.


Love is a powerful thing so let’s not let the world view of love taint something that is meant to be perfect. After all, God is love!


Joana James – Author of Finding RomeoFrom Redemption to MaturityNightmare at Emerald High ,  Alana and Alyssa’s Secret


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